What do you do with your untold stories?

December 14, 2009 by LifeBlazing

I was recently reminded (on Danielle LaPorte’s blog) of this insight from Maya Angelou:

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”

If this is true… if there is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you… then maybe the reverse is true, too?  Maybe there is no greater joy than sharing an important story with someone who really wants to hear it.  Really wants to know what’s going on inside you.

Isn’t that why we write and read blogs?  To story-tell in community?  To practice the art of being human… opinionated… vulnerable… curious… whiny… brave… with others?

I agree with Maya Angelou.  If we feel we don’t have an outlet for our important stories, what starts out feeling like puffy bloated emotions can, indeed, turn into agony.

And by “important,” I just mean memorable.  Something about that story (which is really just a moment… or a series of moments) stood out in your mind, and wanted to be remembered and shared with someone.  Some memorable moments will be gray and crappy.  Lots will be golden warm.  Some sweet.  Some spit-worthy.

And no need for fanciness.  Or great length.  Just capture the part that squeezed you, like this:

“I have  a friend who is a platinum Dad of three daughters.  It’s doubtful that a more devoted Dad exists.  He’s there for everything.  Happily.  There.  For everything.  Each year he creates a Christmas newsletter where he says the exact opposite of what he really means about his girls.  They are high-achieving, mindful, sweet kids.  And he calls them horrible, truant and maladjusted.  It’s hilarious.  I love these newsletters.  The humor is twisted.  And redemptive to a girl like me.”

See?  Easy :-)  Now your turn.  Share a story with me, please.  What stood out for you today?  Wanted to remembered and re-told?

President Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize Acceptance Speech

December 11, 2009 by LifeBlazing

President Barack Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech, given in Oslo City Hall in Oslo, Norway on December 10, 2009:

And here’s the text, as provided by the White House:

“Your Majesties, Your Royal Highnesses, Distinguished Members of the Norwegian Nobel Committee, citizens of America, and citizens of the world:

I receive this honor with deep gratitude and great humility. It is an award that speaks to our highest aspirations — that for all the cruelty and hardship of our world, we are not mere prisoners of fate. Our actions matter, and can bend history in the direction of justice.

And yet I would be remiss if I did not acknowledge the considerable controversy that your generous decision has generated. In part, this is because I am at the beginning, and not the end, of my labors on the world stage. Compared to some of the giants of history who have received this prize — Schweitzer and King; Marshall and Mandela — my accomplishments are slight. And then there are the men and women around the world who have been jailed and beaten in the pursuit of justice; those who toil in humanitarian organizations to relieve suffering; the unrecognized millions whose quiet acts of courage and compassion inspire even the most hardened of cynics. I cannot argue with those who find these men and women — some known, some obscure to all but those they help — to be far more deserving of this honor than I.

But perhaps the most profound issue surrounding my receipt of this prize is the fact that I am the Commander-in-Chief of a nation in the midst of two wars. One of these wars is winding down. The other is a conflict that America did not seek; one in which we are joined by 43 other countries — including Norway — in an effort to defend ourselves and all nations from further attacks.

Still, we are at war, and I am responsible for the deployment of thousands of young Americans to battle in a distant land. Some will kill. Some will be killed. And so I come here with an acute sense of the cost of armed conflict — filled with difficult questions about the relationship between war and peace, and our effort to replace one with the other.

These questions are not new. War, in one form or another, appeared with the first man. At the dawn of history, its morality was not questioned; it was simply a fact, like drought or disease — the manner in which tribes and then civilizations sought power and settled their differences.

Over time, as codes of law sought to control violence within groups, so did philosophers, clerics and statesmen seek to regulate the destructive power of war. The concept of a “just war” emerged, suggesting that war is justified only when it meets certain preconditions: if it is waged as a last resort or in self-defense; if the forced used is proportional; and if, whenever possible, civilians are spared from violence.

For most of history, this concept of just war was rarely observed. The capacity of human beings to think up new ways to kill one another proved inexhaustible, as did our capacity to exempt from mercy those who look different or pray to a different God. Wars between armies gave way to wars between nations — total wars in which the distinction between combatant and civilian became blurred. In the span of 30 years, such carnage would twice engulf this continent. And while it is hard to conceive of a cause more just than the defeat of the Third Reich and the Axis powers, World War II was a conflict in which the total number of civilians who died exceeded the number of soldiers who perished.

In the wake of such destruction, and with the advent of the nuclear age, it became clear to victor and vanquished alike that the world needed institutions to prevent another World War. And so, a quarter century after the United States Senate rejected the League of Nations — an idea for which Woodrow Wilson received this Prize — America led the world in constructing an architecture to keep the peace: a Marshall Plan and a United Nations, mechanisms to govern the waging of war, treaties to protect human rights, prevent genocide and restrict the most dangerous weapons.

In many ways, these efforts succeeded. Yes, terrible wars have been fought, and atrocities committed. But there has been no Third World War. The Cold War ended with jubilant crowds dismantling a wall. Commerce has stitched much of the world together. Billions have been lifted from poverty. The ideals of liberty, self-determination, equality and the rule of law have haltingly advanced. We are the heirs of the fortitude and foresight of generations past, and it is a legacy for which my own country is rightfully proud.

A decade into a new century, this old architecture is buckling under the weight of new threats. The world may no longer shudder at the prospect of war between two nuclear superpowers, but proliferation may increase the risk of catastrophe. Terrorism has long been a tactic, but modern technology allows a few small men with outsized rage to murder innocents on a horrific scale.

Moreover, wars between nations have increasingly given way to wars within nations. The resurgence of ethnic or sectarian conflicts, the growth of secessionist movements, insurgencies and failed states have increasingly trapped civilians in unending chaos. In today’s wars, many more civilians are killed than soldiers; the seeds of future conflict are sown, economies are wrecked, civil societies torn asunder, refugees amassed and children scarred.

I do not bring with me today a definitive solution to the problems of war. What I do know is that meeting these challenges will require the same vision, hard work and persistence of those men and women who acted so boldly decades ago. And it will require us to think in new ways about the notions of just war and the imperatives of a just peace.

We must begin by acknowledging the hard truth that we will not eradicate violent conflict in our lifetimes. There will be times when nations — acting individually or in concert — will find the use of force not only necessary but morally justified.

I make this statement mindful of what Martin Luther King said in this same ceremony years ago: “Violence never brings permanent peace. It solves no social problem: It merely creates new and more complicated ones.” As someone who stands here as a direct consequence of Dr. King’s life’s work, I am living testimony to the moral force of non-violence. I know there is nothing weak, nothing passive, nothing naive in the creed and lives of Gandhi and King.

But as a head of state sworn to protect and defend my nation, I cannot be guided by their examples alone. I face the world as it is, and cannot stand idle in the face of threats to the American people. For make no mistake: Evil does exist in the world. A nonviolent movement could not have halted Hitler’s armies. Negotiations cannot convince al-Qaidas leaders to lay down their arms. To say that force is sometimes necessary is not a call to cynicism — it is a recognition of history, the imperfections of man and the limits of reason.

I raise this point because in many countries there is a deep ambivalence about military action today, no matter the cause. At times, this is joined by a reflexive suspicion of America, the worlds sole military superpower.

Yet the world must remember that it was not simply international institutions — not just treaties and declarations — that brought stability to a post-World War II world. Whatever mistakes we have made, the plain fact is this: The United States of America has helped underwrite global security for more than six decades with the blood of our citizens and the strength of our arms. The service and sacrifice of our men and women in uniform has promoted peace and prosperity from Germany to Korea, and enabled democracy to take hold in places like the Balkans. We have borne this burden not because we seek to impose our will. We have done so out of enlightened self-interest — because we seek a better future for our children and grandchildren, and we believe that their lives will be better if other people’s children and grandchildren can live in freedom and prosperity.

So yes, the instruments of war do have a role to play in preserving the peace. And yet this truth must coexist with another — that no matter how justified, war promises human tragedy. The soldiers courage and sacrifice is full of glory, expressing devotion to country, to cause and to comrades in arms. But war itself is never glorious, and we must never trumpet it as such.

So part of our challenge is reconciling these two seemingly irreconcilable truths — that war is sometimes necessary, and war is at some level an expression of human folly. Concretely, we must direct our effort to the task that President Kennedy called for long ago. “Let us focus,” he said, “on a more practical, more attainable peace, based not on a sudden revolution in human nature but on a gradual evolution in human institutions.”

What might this evolution look like? What might these practical steps be?

To begin with, I believe that all nations — strong and weak alike — must adhere to standards that govern the use of force. I — like any head of state — reserve the right to act unilaterally if necessary to defend my nation. Nevertheless, I am convinced that adhering to standards strengthens those who do, and isolates — and weakens — those who dont.

The world rallied around America after the 9/11 attacks, and continues to support our efforts in Afghanistan, because of the horror of those senseless attacks and the recognized principle of self-defense. Likewise, the world recognized the need to confront Saddam Hussein when he invaded Kuwait — a consensus that sent a clear message to all about the cost of aggression.

Furthermore, America cannot insist that others follow the rules of the road if we refuse to follow them ourselves. For when we don’t, our action can appear arbitrary, and undercut the legitimacy of future intervention — no matter how justified.

This becomes particularly important when the purpose of military action extends beyond self-defense or the defense of one nation against an aggressor. More and more, we all confront difficult questions about how to prevent the slaughter of civilians by their own government, or to stop a civil war whose violence and suffering can engulf an entire region.

I believe that force can be justified on humanitarian grounds, as it was in the Balkans, or in other places that have been scarred by war. Inaction tears at our conscience and can lead to more costly intervention later. That is why all responsible nations must embrace the role that militaries with a clear mandate can play to keep the peace.

America’s commitment to global security will never waver. But in a world in which threats are more diffuse, and missions more complex, America cannot act alone. This is true in Afghanistan. This is true in failed states like Somalia, where terrorism and piracy is joined by famine and human suffering. And sadly, it will continue to be true in unstable regions for years to come.

The leaders and soldiers of NATO countries — and other friends and allies — demonstrate this truth through the capacity and courage they have shown in Afghanistan. But in many countries, there is a disconnect between the efforts of those who serve and the ambivalence of the broader public. I understand why war is not popular. But I also know this: The belief that peace is desirable is rarely enough to achieve it. Peace requires responsibility. Peace entails sacrifice. That is why NATO continues to be indispensable. That is why we must strengthen U.N. and regional peacekeeping, and not leave the task to a few countries. That is why we honor those who return home from peacekeeping and training abroad to Oslo and Rome; to Ottawa and Sydney; to Dhaka and Kigali — we honor them not as makers of war, but as wagers of peace.

Let me make one final point about the use of force. Even as we make difficult decisions about going to war, we must also think clearly about how we fight it. The Nobel Committee recognized this truth in awarding its first prize for peace to Henry Dunant — the founder of the Red Cross, and a driving force behind the Geneva Conventions.

Where force is necessary, we have a moral and strategic interest in binding ourselves to certain rules of conduct. And even as we confront a vicious adversary that abides by no rules, I believe that the United States of America must remain a standard bearer in the conduct of war. That is what makes us different from those whom we fight. That is a source of our strength. That is why I prohibited torture. That is why I ordered the prison at Guantanamo Bay closed. And that is why I have reaffirmed America’s commitment to abide by the Geneva Conventions. We lose ourselves when we compromise the very ideals that we fight to defend. And we honor those ideals by upholding them not just when it is easy, but when it is hard.

I have spoken to the questions that must weigh on our minds and our hearts as we choose to wage war. But let me turn now to our effort to avoid such tragic choices, and speak of three ways that we can build a just and lasting peace.

First, in dealing with those nations that break rules and laws, I believe that we must develop alternatives to violence that are tough enough to change behavior — for if we want a lasting peace, then the words of the international community must mean something. Those regimes that break the rules must be held accountable. Sanctions must exact a real price. Intransigence must be met with increased pressure — and such pressure exists only when the world stands together as one.

One urgent example is the effort to prevent the spread of nuclear weapons, and to seek a world without them. In the middle of the last century, nations agreed to be bound by a treaty whose bargain is clear: All will have access to peaceful nuclear power; those without nuclear weapons will forsake them; and those with nuclear weapons will work toward disarmament. I am committed to upholding this treaty. It is a centerpiece of my foreign policy. And I am working with President Medvedev to reduce America and Russia’s nuclear stockpiles.

But it is also incumbent upon all of us to insist that nations like Iran and North Korea do not game the system. Those who claim to respect international law cannot avert their eyes when those laws are flouted. Those who care for their own security cannot ignore the danger of an arms race in the Middle East or East Asia. Those who seek peace cannot stand idly by as nations arm themselves for nuclear war.

The same principle applies to those who violate international law by brutalizing their own people. When there is genocide in Darfur, systematic rape in Congo or repression in Burma — there must be consequences. And the closer we stand together, the less likely we will be faced with the choice between armed intervention and complicity in oppression.

This brings me to a second point — the nature of the peace that we seek. For peace is not merely the absence of visible conflict. Only a just peace based upon the inherent rights and dignity of every individual can truly be lasting.

It was this insight that drove drafters of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights after the Second World War. In the wake of devastation, they recognized that if human rights are not protected, peace is a hollow promise.

And yet all too often, these words are ignored. In some countries, the failure to uphold human rights is excused by the false suggestion that these are Western principles, foreign to local cultures or stages of a nation’s development. And within America, there has long been a tension between those who describe themselves as realists or idealists — a tension that suggests a stark choice between the narrow pursuit of interests or an endless campaign to impose our values.

I reject this choice. I believe that peace is unstable where citizens are denied the right to speak freely or worship as they please, choose their own leaders or assemble without fear. Pent up grievances fester, and the suppression of tribal and religious identity can lead to violence. We also know that the opposite is true. Only when Europe became free did it finally find peace. America has never fought a war against a democracy, and our closest friends are governments that protect the rights of their citizens. No matter how callously defined, neither America’s interests — nor the worlds — are served by the denial of human aspirations.

So even as we respect the unique culture and traditions of different countries, America will always be a voice for those aspirations that are universal. We will bear witness to the quiet dignity of reformers like Aung Sang Suu Kyi; to the bravery of Zimbabweans who cast their ballots in the face of beatings; to the hundreds of thousands who have marched silently through the streets of Iran. It is telling that the leaders of these governments fear the aspirations of their own people more than the power of any other nation. And it is the responsibility of all free people and free nations to make clear to these movements that hope and history are on their side.

Let me also say this: The promotion of human rights cannot be about exhortation alone. At times, it must be coupled with painstaking diplomacy. I know that engagement with repressive regimes lacks the satisfying purity of indignation. But I also know that sanctions without outreach — and condemnation without discussion — can carry forward a crippling status quo. No repressive regime can move down a new path unless it has the choice of an open door.

In light of the Cultural Revolution’s horrors, Nixon’s meeting with Mao appeared inexcusable — and yet it surely helped set China on a path where millions of its citizens have been lifted from poverty, and connected to open societies. Pope John Paul’s engagement with Poland created space not just for the Catholic Church, but for labor leaders like Lech Walesa. Ronald Reagan’s efforts on arms control and embrace of perestroika not only improved relations with the Soviet Union, but empowered dissidents throughout Eastern Europe. There is no simple formula here. But we must try as best we can to balance isolation and engagement, pressure and incentives, so that human rights and dignity are advanced over time.

Third, a just peace includes not only civil and political rights — it must encompass economic security and opportunity. For true peace is not just freedom from fear, but freedom from want.

It is undoubtedly true that development rarely takes root without security; it is also true that security does not exist where human beings do not have access to enough food, or clean water, or the medicine they need to survive. It does not exist where children cannot aspire to a decent education or a job that supports a family. The absence of hope can rot a society from within.

And that is why helping farmers feed their own people — or nations educate their children and care for the sick — is not mere charity. It is also why the world must come together to confront climate change. There is little scientific dispute that if we do nothing, we will face more drought, famine and mass displacement that will fuel more conflict for decades. For this reason, it is not merely scientists and activists who call for swift and forceful action — it is military leaders in my country and others who understand that our common security hangs in the balance.

Agreements among nations. Strong institutions. Support for human rights. Investments in development. All of these are vital ingredients in bringing about the evolution that President Kennedy spoke about. And yet, I do not believe that we will have the will, or the staying power, to complete this work without something more — and that is the continued expansion of our moral imagination, an insistence that there is something irreducible that we all share.

As the world grows smaller, you might think it would be easier for human beings to recognize how similar we are, to understand that we all basically want the same things, that we all hope for the chance to live out our lives with some measure of happiness and fulfillment for ourselves and our families.

And yet, given the dizzying pace of globalization, and the cultural leveling of modernity, it should come as no surprise that people fear the loss of what they cherish about their particular identities — their race, their tribe and, perhaps most powerfully, their religion. In some places, this fear has led to conflict. At times, it even feels like we are moving backwards. We see it in the Middle East, as the conflict between Arabs and Jews seems to harden. We see it in nations that are torn asunder by tribal lines.

Most dangerously, we see it in the way that religion is used to justify the murder of innocents by those who have distorted and defiled the great religion of Islam, and who attacked my country from Afghanistan. These extremists are not the first to kill in the name of God; the cruelties of the Crusades are amply recorded. But they remind us that no Holy War can ever be a just war. For if you truly believe that you are carrying out divine will, then there is no need for restraint — no need to spare the pregnant mother, or the medic, or even a person of one’s own faith. Such a warped view of religion is not just incompatible with the concept of peace, but the purpose of faith — for the one rule that lies at the heart of every major religion is that we do unto others as we would have them do unto us.

Adhering to this law of love has always been the core struggle of human nature. We are fallible. We make mistakes, and fall victim to the temptations of pride, and power, and sometimes evil. Even those of us with the best intentions will at times fail to right the wrongs before us.

But we do not have to think that human nature is perfect for us to still believe that the human condition can be perfected. We do not have to live in an idealized world to still reach for those ideals that will make it a better place. The nonviolence practiced by men like Gandhi and King may not have been practical or possible in every circumstance, but the love that they preached — their faith in human progress — must always be the North Star that guides us on our journey.

For if we lose that faith — if we dismiss it as silly or naive, if we divorce it from the decisions that we make on issues of war and peace — then we lose what is best about humanity. We lose our sense of possibility. We lose our moral compass.

Like generations have before us, we must reject that future. As Dr. King said at this occasion so many years ago: “I refuse to accept despair as the final response to the ambiguities of history. I refuse to accept the idea that the ‘isness’ of man’s present nature makes him morally incapable of reaching up for the eternal ‘oughtness’ that forever confronts him.”

So let us reach for the world that ought to be — that spark of the divine that still stirs within each of our souls. Somewhere today, in the here and now, a soldier sees he’s outgunned but stands firm to keep the peace. Somewhere today, in this world, a young protestor awaits the brutality of her government, but has the courage to march on. Somewhere today, a mother facing punishing poverty still takes the time to teach her child, who believes that a cruel world still has a place for his dreams.

Let us live by their example. We can acknowledge that oppression will always be with us, and still strive for justice. We can admit the intractability of deprivation, and still strive for dignity. We can understand that there will be war, and still strive for peace. We can do that — for that is the story of human progress; that is the hope of all the world; and at this moment of challenge, that must be our work here on Earth.”

Reinvent Yourself. Often.

December 9, 2009 by LifeBlazing


People who can re-invent themselves have my deeeep respect.  Change isn’t always easy.  Or beautiful.  But growth is a form of change.  So is improvement.  And progress.  Strengthening.  Forgiveness.  Discoveries. Hey, turns out a lot of wonderful things fold change into it.  Or tranformation, if you prefer.

Before = Caterpillar.  After = Butterfly

Yep.  Transformation is definitely worth that gooey-mess that happens in pupa.  We’re talking about being able to fly.  So, assuming you’re interested in allowing transformation to have its Way with you, here are three ways you can get that chrysalis started.  (And no, this isn’t limited to New Year’s Resolutions.  I’m a fan of transformation all year long.)

1.  Choose your company and conversations wisely. - Three months ago I discovered The Visionary Network.  My eyes gobbled their pages’ pixels.  I experienced the essence of Home, Family and Tribe. Cellularly.  Eternally.  Maybe that sounds dramatic?  I wish I could pack even more mmmpph into my statements about them.  These folks have genius-fever that sweats, glistens… and then works its way into your system.  And before you know it, you have no further need of telescopes, microscopes or even kaleidoscopes… because you now operate at limitless levels your soul always knew about.  But forgot.  Soleira and Santari Green help you remember.  They know the secrets of butterflies and the magic of dragons.  And they flow that Elixious-Nectar into their network.  I am more me because of my weekly talks with them the past 12 weeks. Just as brilliance and innovation requires human-hosts, so does mediocrity and unimaginativeness.  Be mindful of who you share your time and space with.

2.  Live for more than you. – I am not a big enough cause to sustain my own excitement.  You are not a big enough cause to sustain your own excitement.  And those aren’t moral statements.  Cleverly trying to co-erce you and me to go out and do some good in the world.  No, the commitment to live for more than you is a way to keep your waters stirred and fresh.  To keep you deeply interested in Life.  And Life deeply interested in you.

3.  Leap in your learning and doing. – Wanna know the absolute best time to learn how to finally master your life?  Now.  As Shakespeare liked to say, “Very now.” This teleclass, which starts next Friday, is created for those who know there’s so much more beneath their skin that yearns to be expressed… seen… heard… and lived.  You’ll get a new understanding of, and relationship with, your magnificent power.  Santari and I are co-leading this 8-part experience.  Check-in with yourself and see if you’re inspired to join us.

How can deep, feeling people stay connected. And happy?

December 3, 2009 by LifeBlazing

This post is a brief chronicle of a wonderful community-in-the-making.

Deep, feeling people.

A year ago I created a MeetUp Group for Highly Sensitive People in Chicago.  I did this for purely selfish reasons.  Basically, I wanted to be able to hang-out with people who also experience life with ultra-sensitivity, and who are interested in celebrating that aspect of themselves.  (No more self-repudiation!) A local group like that didn’t exist, so I figured I’d try to build the thing I wanted to experience.

And I’m so glad I did.

2009 + HSPs + Chicago = soft place in my heart.

In our first year we met monthly and talked our way through Dr. Elaine Aron’s landmark book, The Highly Sensitive Person.  We did this chapter-by-chapter, and always created conversations that were soulful, warm, funny, enlightening and only occasionally a lil’ heavy.  Tears, humor, tea, confessions, and big sighs of relief (“That happens to you, too?”) were all enthusiastically shared.  Even though we HSPs make up roughly 20% of the population, at our MeetUp Group we make up 100% of the gathering.  A statistic never felt so good.

We got to skip the small-talk-chit-chat that so many of us struggle with, and just dive into the matters of heart, spirit and meaning.  Sublime.

Fresh breezes for 2010.

I playfully call one of our members ”Fresh Breeze” because her energy is like that.  Sparkly and effervescent.  I’d like the framework of our group to have those qualities, too.  How can a framework be sparkly, vibrant and totally alive?  Read on.  The answer to that is coming in two paragraphs.

Last year worked.  It worked well, in my opinion.  But that was because of the quality of the members.  We could have given consideration to Dixie cups, and something valuable would still have bubbled up because that’s just how we’re wired.  And while a book-club format is sensible for a group of people who tend to be voracious readers anyway, I still always got the sense that there was something more we could be pulling through collectively.  Here’s how I envision that more-ness…

A pulsing, breathing mosaic.  And each piece has its own unique thing to talk about.

Yes, let’s still get-together the last Saturday of each month at our Special Place from 11:00 am to 12:30 pm.  But rather than an orchestrated book-club format, let’s use our time together like this:

(Please Note:  You can always pass on any of the steps below, and just show up to bask in the feel-good vibes our Group generates.  There are no requirements or expectations other than kindness.  But if you want to…) you are invited to:

1.  Share some significant text. This significant text could be a fortune from a cookie, a greeting card, a paragraph from your thesis or journal, a passage from a book you’re currently reading, the lyrics of a song, a portion of a newspaper or magazine article, a wedding invitation, a blog post, you get the point.  The text can be from any source, but it should be relevant to your sensitivity;

2.  Share why/how that significant text impacts you as a Sensitive; and

3.  Allow others to engage with your significant text, too…  or maybe ask you a question about it.

Those are the general guidelines, and here’s why I’m so fond of them:

1.  Always the right topic. Because the significant text is something you pre-selected, there’s obviously something about it that draws you to it.  That’s a charge – a sign of life – and it’s transformational and energizing to speak from this place.

2.  Always the right timing. By bringing a significant text that feels current and timely for you, you honor your own season.  And you get the caring attention of your fellow group-members while you do so.

3.  Always a great variety. By using many different sources of material, we add multiple perspectives to each meeting that we wouldn’t get if we limited ourselves to a single title.

This format allows for a lot of space, spontaneity and evolution, while also being softly structured.  Our scheduled time of 90 minutes will be equally divided among us all.

2010 is going to be magical.

Happy 1-Year Birthday, Joyful Work for Sensitive People!

November 26, 2009 by LifeBlazing

Today is Thanksgiving.  Yay!  Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Today is also the 1-year birthday of my other website: Joyful Work for Sensitive People. Hooray!  Happy 1-year Birthday, JWFSP!

The baby-idea for that site started as this blog post.  And as I was thinking about the past year, I realized that the birth of JWFSP is a great way for me to gauge progress I’ve made.  Hey, growth charts aren’t just for kids.  Or New Year’s.

Self-Discovery.

The single best way to figure out how you want to be in the world, and with whom is through self-discovery.  It shows you exactly the kinds of things you want to do… the kinds of environments you want to do them in… and what you hope to be remembered for.  (You do want a legacy, don’t you?)  Without taking the time to get to know yourself, your life is pretty much a crapshoot:  maybe you end up with satisfying results, maybe you don’t.  I’d rather have strong influence over my odds.  And my days.

Entrepreneurship.

As a lifelong employee… of someone else… I was very surprised to find my self-discovery process lead me to entrepreneurship.  I’ve had so many limiting beliefs to shed, but coming to see myself as the real provider of my life is the most empowering mindset I’ve ever experienced.  ”Benefits”  and ”paid vacation” mean something entirely different to me now.  I don’t believe an outside authority is better able to feed me than I am.  Life is my Source.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m still scared sometimes.  But the fear has shifted.  Now I’m more scared of what will happen if I keep denying myself full expression.  I haven’t let completely go yet, but I don’t want to hold back anymore.  I want to greet Life with the wide-open arms It deserves.  I’ve got a ways to go — and a job to leap from — but following are some of the discoveries I have made so far.

The great parts.

  • Consciousness – Entrepreneurship is an accelerated path of personal growth.  It brings your strengths, talents, fears and growing-edges to the surface.  To be dealt with.  Like, now.  There is so little room for B.S. on this path. No wonder I love it so much.
  • Creativity - Entrepreneurship is the ultimate vehicle of self-expression.  You are Creatrix of it all.  The vision.  The brand.  The clients.  The product or service.  The message.  The niche.  The business-model. The money.  Everything.  Second only to Mommies, Entrepreneurs are the most highly creative and resourceful people on the planet.
  • Community – Entrepreneurship (especially when internet-based) brings you into meaningful conversation with like-minded people all over the world. These sacred connections (i.e., YOU!) are quickly becoming my absolute favorite part of it.  I love you.
  • Confidence – Entrepreneurship reveals leadership skills you never knew you had.  Comfort-zone? What’s that?  This is a growing-zone, baby.  Not that the growing can’t be gentle, but still… it sometimes requires the deft moves of a ninja-monk-warrior-queen.
  • Compassion -  Entrepreneurship can deepen your care and concern for the world around you.  Maybe because it so WILDLY amps up your sense of responsibility and ability.  You see that you are impactful, and you get turned on by using that impact to do some good.
  • Cash – Entrepreneurship lets you make money on your creativity, curiosity, passion and interests.  Money earned this way is juicier and just more right. In every way.

The not-so-great parts (but worth it, anyway).

  • Obsession – So far this journey has been a little like falling in love — consuming.  My biz-related ideas multiply like bunnies… and I’m driven to (at least try and) implement every one of them… so I “borrow” time from the Sleep and Social sectors… and I only feel tired when I’m not able to Do My Thing… which is to create content and connect with my resonant people.  As I’ve said somewhere before, “I want to spread myself thick.”  But apparently, single-minded devotion like this has the appearance of imbalanced obsession.  Hey, I’m in love ;-)
  • Isolation – Most of the people in my off-line life (including my boyfriend) are not nearly as internet-addicted as I am.  They see me pouring myself into something, but they’re not really sure what exactly it is. Or they do see, but wonder ‘why that‘?  Oh well.  Love is to be experienced, not explained.

Self-Discovery + Entrepreneurship.

Learning about my sensory processing sensitivity inspired me to align my outer-life with my inner-core.  The very first thing I noticed screaming for alignment was my work.  Ahhh, work.  This has always been the most challenging and elusive puzzle to me, so I started with it… head-on… using this very detailed, but super-effective 10-Step Action Guide.

The past year has been a lot of learning.  A lot of sticking-neck-out.  I don’t think I’ve ever been as focused or committed as I am right now. And as a result, I am more clear and less apologetic about my essence. So I’m going to keep working that angle, from the inside-out, until my outer-life rightly reflects what’s going on in these “still” waters.  LOL.

How ’bout you?  What growth are you especially grateful for today?

A Change is Gonna Come

November 19, 2009 by LifeBlazing

(Seal’s remake of Sam Cooke’s ”A Change is Gonna Come”)

 

There is medicine in this song.  Hope-reviving medicine.

Listen.  Let it do its healing.

Let it make you feel better.

Let it make you believe again.

If you have been waiting for something to happen.

Been working for something to happen.

Been looking.

Been loving.

Been praying.

 Believe me when I tell you that I know your pain.

The pain of insufferable delay.

Despite your very, very best effort.

Despite that bright, shiny heart of yours

that keeps on liftin’ and shiftin’

and parting seas.

To you I say:

“Keep holding your rod out.”

Don’t you dare tire.

Don’t you dare put it down.

You do as Moses did, you hear?

Because those waters will most definitely part.

(“Moses Parting The Red Sea,” by Aaron Hicks)

 

And your change will come.

And the sheer beauty of it…

oh my…

Heaven will be jealous.

Enjoy a triple-distilled glass of holiday essence.

November 17, 2009 by LifeBlazing

(Disclaimer: The above picture of triple-
distilled tequila is just a visual metaphor.)

To get the essence of something, you extract the purest part of the substance. This process can be done with all sorts of things like alcohol, oil and even holiday habits.

Customs and traditions. At their best, customs give our life a sense of stability.  So much changes, but traditions can be counted on.  They are reliable.  To a fault.

When they lose their meaning… their heart and soul… the pulse that gave them life in the first place… when customs lose these things, they actually dehydrate the occasion. When we’re not mindful:

  • Togetherness can degrade into shopping-debt.
  • Peacefulness can degrade into performance.
  • Graceful simplicity can degrade into complicated stress.

Every year, consumerism threatens to hijack the precious Soul of this Season.  But mindfulness can stop that hijacking in its tracks.

All of the triggers and prompts to buy! buy! buy! can, instead, arouse within us a more conscious response.  Let every advertisement serve as a reminder to extract Holiday Essence.

Distilling our actions. Below are my optimistic interpretations of seven popular holiday habits:

  1. Shopping/Buying = Our desire to give, bestow and endow others with the knowledge that they matter to us.

  2. Parties/Getting Together = Our desire to connect and be in community with each other.

  3. Cooking/Baking = Our desire to nourish and comfort others.

  4. Wrapping Gifts/Decorating Trees = Our desire to add twinkling beauty, adornment and wonder to our environment.

  5. Decorative Lights/Candles = Our desire to brighten the darkness from shorter days and possible loneliness or sadness.  We illuminate our way.

  6. Caroling/Singing = Our desire to fill our surroundings with cheer and contemplation.  Song can carry us from bouncing euphoria to sacred stillness.

  7. Resolutions = Our desire to reflect, grow and expand our being.  We reconcile Time’s wisdom.  We bless what has been, what is, and what we would like to be.

There are many winter observances, with different origins in our shared humanity, including:

  • Thanksgiving

  • Christmas

  • Diwali

  • Hanukkah

  • Kwanzaa

  • Winter Solstice

  • Yule

  • New Year’s

Retailers do not define this time of year.  Nor does one particular belief system.

We do.

We each get to decide how we will manifest timeless virtues like:

  • GRATITUDE
  • GENEROSITY
  • CHEER
  • RENEWAL

We get to create meaning beyond merchandise.  Beyond unrefreshed ritual and custom.

Whatever your path,
whatever your practice,
I wish you unshakeable peace,
and unstoppable joy.

P.S.  For your listening pleasure, here’s a link to a beautiful 2-minute Taize song, Mon Ame Se Repose.”

A Listening Life

November 14, 2009 by LifeBlazing

listen

Listening.

I have a lot of passionate thoughts and practices around listening.  I used to do it professionally, as a hospice chaplain.  Before and since that, I (do my best to) offer it in my relationships… not just with adults, but with children, animals, and all of Nature.  (You should hear the wise things trees have to say!  All those years they’ve been standing and witnessing everything around them.  I dare you to sit beneath/beside one, and ask It what It has to share with you.  My first tree-talk changed me forever.)

I am so enamored with my listening lifestyle, that I’m a member of the  International Listening Association just so I can be in community with others who are as wild about listening as I am.  And there are other organizations, too, that see listening as a sacred art and spiritual practice.  They’re in my family, also.

What’s your opinion about listening?

I’m doing initial research for a personal project (I promise to tell you all about it as it takes more shape) and I could really benefit from hearing your thoughts and opinions about listening, specifically:

  • How do you define a “good listener”?  What do they do?  What are their traits?
  • How often do you have the chance to be with a good listener?
  • On a scale of 1-10, and just using your gut as a guide, how do you rate your listening skills?
  • What do you think about this essay by Brenda Ueland?

Your time is precious.  So if you can answer even one of these questions in the comments below, I’d be so grateful.

The sanity of wanting to be right where you are.

November 11, 2009 by LifeBlazing

green_grass

Angels.

They want human bodies.  They want to descend — come to dense Earth — so they can experience the peaks and valleys of human life.

Humans.

We want angelic-light bodies.  We want to ascend — go to airy-fairy Heaven — so we can experience the transcendence of angelic life.

What’s up with the never-ending quest and the never-satisfied desire to migrate to another side, where the grass is supposedly greener?  The water cleaner?  The love stronger?

To.  And fro.

Back.  And forth.

I know a Merry-Go-Round when I see one.  A carousel.  A gerbil-wheel.  A treadmill.

Round and round and insufferably round.  Who said this was supposed to be fun?  Packing up and hurrying to X… only to find that we’d really rather  flock to Y… and then, of course, dwell eternally at Z…

*exasperated sigh*

But in all those migrations.  Through all those transitions.

Did we ever pause long enough to actually, savoringly love the very right-now moment?  Or were we always too busy in a rushed hurry with multi-tasking spheres of enlightenment and ladders of ambition to notice.  To breathe in.  To realize the crushed bliss beneath our feet… within our tousled hairs… swirling about in our soup… lounging between our sheets?

Angels.  Humans.  And all other sapient beings who enjoy travel, journey and adventures.  Whatever we are… Wherever we are…

Pause.

pause_button

Give thanks for your Green’s Splendor.

Just as it is right now.

I think more grace and radiance does eventually get added to our green… to our yard… to our circumstance… but only after we give true, ecstatic thanks for the green we’ve got.

You had me at “thumbscoop.”

November 7, 2009 by LifeBlazing

thumbscoop

 

Polarities are amusing.  Look at these, and consider how they often divide us:

  • Democrats / Republicans
  • Vegans / Omnivores
  • Affluent / Low-Income
  • Liberal / Conservative
  • Simplicity / Materialism
  • Black / White
  • Artistic / Analytical

Personally, I don’t get too caught-up in either/or thinking.  But there was an exception…

  • Mac / PC

I’ve been using computers a long time (22 years!), and every one has been a PC.  But I’ve always been very curious about Macs.  You might even call it a crush… Steve Jobs’ humble beginning… Apple’s trademark zen designs… the mystique of what exactly Creatives do with them.  I wanted to know!  But I was also scared to “make the switch.”  It felt like deciding to all-of-a-sudden start writing with my least dominant hand.  Just for kicks.

But something happened and *poof* in a nano-second all my fears about making this change vanished.  I went to Apple’s website, and came across this blurb:

“There’s a story behind each part. Take the thumbscoop, for example. It’s the indentation that allows you to open the display. If the scoop is too deep, you put too much pressure on the display to open it. If it’s too shallow, you struggle to open the display. It may seem incidental, but if the thumbscoop is well designed, it makes the difference between a bad experience and a good one. The challenge of the thumbscoop was to create a crisply machined scoop that was still comfortable to use. The designers at Apple worked on hundreds of versions of the thumbscoop — even examining them under an electron microscope — to get it right.”

That.  is.  poetic.

If that much attention (an electron microscope?!) was given to something as subtle as the lid-opening… if that much care was invested into how my lid-flipping experience feels, what else had they labored over?  What other nuances had they mastered for my pleasure?

Today, I bit ;-)

Apple-Logo-in-Purple

I’ve been using my MacBook all of 3 hours so far and, already, I’ve got 20+ people identified with iPhoto’s face-recognition; my boyfriend and I made a hilarious song with GarageBand; and I started my first video-project with iMovie.

*swoon*

I can’t believe I waited so long to enjoy this intuitive, fluid, neural-friendly, imagination-enhancing, technology.  Thank goodness for that irresistible thumbscoop… or I might still be in rigid PC-land wondering ’bout the other dreamy side.

Now I’m there.

Got limiting polarities?  Jump ‘em!